I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
