i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
