Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He felt like a one man threesome
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Randomize
