i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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