In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
