ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
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I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Semen is not good for contacts.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
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Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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