matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Randomize
