he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize