is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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