3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
