I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
