i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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