It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
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