So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
You've changed since you got that strap on
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
