I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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