so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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