Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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