I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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