I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
