Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
