i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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