I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
