I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
you made out with another girl for some wings