Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
