your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
my mouth tastes like poor choices
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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