you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize