yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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