I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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