so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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