Ambien. No doubt about it.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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