Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
be right there i have to get my cape
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
