He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
