Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
The air taste purple.