I want to make a zoo with you.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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