I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
