Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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