so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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