I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
