It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
