is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
How naked do you want me to be?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
