Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize
