do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
