so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
and i looked up. we had an audience...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
