She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize