erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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