keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
