It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
