I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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