We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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