All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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