does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
There r osticjed everywhere
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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